Text of the Artwork
truth
I’m... a little lost.
I’m still new to poetry.
I’m not really sure how to start my pieces.
I’m trying to write less anxiously, more honestly
I’m... a Sagittarius? and a fire sign?
And I realize that may mean something to some people,
but I’ve never been one to let my future just happen to me
I don’t follow all the rules
I don’t always listen to my GPS
I check all of my pockets every time I leave the house
I swear I’d lose my right arm if it wasn’t attached
I often get lost in thought
I intentionally get lost in love
Get drunk off the high of falling for someone
But never get used to the feeling of hitting the ground
‘Co-dependence’ keeps co-signing my relationships,
I’m still trying to find a new roommate.
I grew up the youngest of three
and quickly learned how to speak the fastest
sprinkle full sentences in the space of syllables
otherwise risk being unheard.
I like writing in other people’s voices
because I still haven’t found mine yet.
‘self-confidence’ is a four letter word
eye contact: a work-in-progress
and I’m trying to sublet thank you
where i’m sorry normally lives in my vocab
I’m... kind of extra
in almost everything I do.
am always a little more than people ask for
because sometimes it’s just fun
to subvert the script that others already wrote for you
but sometimes
sometimes it’s a survival tactic
sometimes you have to be more
than other people can take away
sometimes you have to scale two towers
just to keep your seat at the fellowship
just to be seen on the same level
I’d like to think I have layers
that most people have only grazed the outer crust
they’d be surprised to find out my filling
to see I’ve always been stuffed with love and cheese and really bad puns
hell, my first language was corny jokes
second - song lyrics, then movie quotes
I love a well-placed double entendre
and think the sexiest thing a woman can wear is her heart on her sleeve
I’m... Christian.
It’s both my name and my creed.
I like pop culture, marvel movies,
and trying to fix anyone else’s problems but my own
I’m unreliable with names but great at games like ‘taboo’ and ‘scattergories’
And I’d like to think I can rock a fedora.
I don’t need to know whether or not that’s true.
Someday, I hope I make myself proud.
Someday, I hope I accept I already have.
Hope I can accept that it's not the pursuit that leads to perfection
but merely the permission to be.
About the Artist
Soulstuf (aka Christian Perfas) (Sagittarius)
Christian Perfas is a spoken word poet who goes by the moniker "Soul Stuf." Raised with a background in theatre and improv, he has been honing his craft with some amazing institutions such as the Melrose Poetry Bureau and the Poetry Brothel (among others) and loves to seek new opportunities.
@soulstuf
Curator’s Note
This poem was originally performed live for Praxinoscope: Signs of the Zodiac at 1642 Bar, Historic Filipinotown, Los Angeles California on June 12, 2022.
PeformX Documents No. 2 containing printed documentation of texts drawn from this performance will be available for purchase September 2022.
Note: PerformX Documents are Free for Subscribers!
Production Notes
This podcast and performance series is hosted by Derek Denckla.
Sound was produced by John Dawson, Magnetic South Studios, ind him @magneticsouthrecordings and listen to his other projects at magneticsouth.bandcamp.com.
Our theme music “Alien Desert” was composed by Cato Gilmour @cato_gilmour.
Still images are the work of Derek Denckla, except where otherwise noted.
Share this post